INTERESTING poem.

Not for the faint of heart.

Bloodbath by Christian Drake

And it came in like the barking of dogs in your belly,
the lunatic dogs that bark every full moon on the dot.
The clock in you unwound, the little room collapsed,
and the blood trickled out in a thin red ribbon,
licking the white sheets.
They call it a period, but it’s really a run-on sentence
babbling on all week. It’s the definition of womanhood
reduced by repetition to the tedium of tampon commercials,
punchlines, and the day-long math test of cramps
shooting through you like swimmer’s stitches
while you’re in the middle of the river.
And I watch you fight to swim to the other side
of the bed, kicking, gasping hard between gulps of chamomile tea.
But when the blood is calm, it is beautiful
as a bone-handled knife. It dreams, and as it dreams
it drools like a baby. It’s the drip-drip of a faucet
as we go to sleep, it’s a bee beating itself against the glass.
It’s a presence, not like a ghost but like a memory
in your skin, changing the pitch and timbre
of your body to my ear as I pull my fingers across
your belly and you find my lips in the dark like a magnet
and I slip my fingers through your hair as gently as thoughts
and you say,
"Baby, not tonight. I’m on my period."
And I say,

Baby, I will make love to you until we look like a war zone.
Give me the sweet murder of your body
until they string up crime scene tape across the bedroom,
because period sex is awesome.
I will love you like surgery and I will transplant your heart.
I will love you like a horror movie,
’cause it’s about to be a bloodbath in here.
Because I need a hot transfusion of your love, type A-positive
because you can’t B-negative when I’m giving you my O, O, O…
I want to surf your crimson wave,
and invite your Aunt Flow for a threesome.
I want to reverse your curse, because the Red Sox are in town.
I want to make this a "special time."
I want to put my submarine in your Red Sea
and hunt for Red October, and do not hesitate
to ask me to go snorkeling down there.
Because if I’m going to order the finest steak,
I’m going to eat it rare.
Yeah, because I crave the taste of blood,
and I want your nerves raw like a bullet wound valentine.
And whether it’s hard or sweet, we’re going to leave
skid marks on the sheets
and handprints on the walls.
So throw that tampon in the air like a cotton Sputnik, just lob it,
’cause in the end, I want to be bloodier than John Wayne Bobbitt.
Your time of the month has perfect timing
because you open like the elevator doors in "The Shining."
I like some ketchup when I’m dining,
but I want to taste copper like I’m dying.
So let the woman in you make a man out of me.
Let’s get unclean. Because this lovemaking is no less perfect
than the moon rising in you, and this lovemaking is the gospel music
made by the rhythm of flesh and blood and flesh and blood,
and this blood is the closest I will ever be to making love
to your insides, sailing through your veins and arteries.
This blood on my skin is the photograph I take
when I visit your heart.

c. Christian Drake 2005


Word.

Whoa

I got a boyfriend.  I don't know how the hell it happened but for the first time I am not on the market.

WORD.

I haven't updated in ages but so much has changed and I have so much going on.  My hair is different...I'm filing a lawsuit against the salon from one of my older entries...my birthday is coming up...I'm going to fashion week on Valentine's day (omg).  I actually have a Valentine (OMG!). 

Last week I went to this restaurant in Chelsea called Crema Retaurant in Chelsea for restaurant week.  It was SO GOOD!  If you're in the NYC area I would definitely go there.  It's a bit pricey (we got the restaurant week deal--$35 for 3 courses) but totally worth it.  There wasn't a single thing I got that I didn't like.  Sangria--amazing.  Tacos--delicious.  Enchilada--magnificent.  Tres Leches Strawberry Shortcake--orgasmic. 

I've been having fun doing my nails lately...I can't be bothered with any of my fake ones so I've been using my limited skills to do some of little deigns on my own nails:

 

I loved this one!

For that, all I did was paint the base color pink and use one of those art deco nail polishes to do the stripes.

 

I like this one a lot too...

I really wanted to do polka dots, but I wanted it to look pro and of course I don't have any proper tools so I had to be a bit crafty.  I used a ballpoint pen with no ink and dipped it into the white.  Amazingly enough it made *perfect* dots.

That's really it for now...I need a camera so I can take amazing photos of fashion week.  :*<  Ah well...back to calculus homework.

Until next time...

Happy X-Mas! And New Year!

Happy New Year peeps!  I didn't really do much for the big count down.  I had some margaritas with my sister and took a bath.  ;)

So of course I didn't really get anything from my wishlist...Oh well typical. I did get to see all of my longtime loves and friends.  We're so cute and we went ice skating in Culver City.  I only fell once!  After that we went back to Satia's (my secret santa) house to play games and exchange gifts. 

I always give excellent presents.  I got Satia's some Juicy Couture tights and a cute scarf because scarves are her thing from Urban Outfitters (not pictured--those are just props for these pictures ;).

Satia and Me

My SS, Gloria, got me this cute plaid shirt dress and these cute slipper socks (also not pictured...).

Gloria and Me

It was so nice to finally see all of my buddies.  Even though I'm making lots of great friends in NYC, there's this familiarity that comes with knowing each other since middle school that can't be compared with.  I really miss all of them and I wish I could see them more often.   I didn't know they turned into such partyers though.  They all went to TAO (Together as One)--some huge rave--for New Years.  I'm not so sure that raves are my thing but I said I might go with them to EDC??? in June.

Anyway, with my own hard-earned dollars I decided to try a new foundation--Bobbi Brown's Stick Foundation in Natural Tan.

$40 a pop

I'm wearing it in these pictures.  I really need to get a camera (which also went unanswered on my non-beauty related wishlists.  Oh Santa..) to take proper pics.  Regardless, its an excellent foundation.  It provides a nearly full coverage that looks very natural--just like second skin.  However, unfortunately I got a huuuuuuuuge painful pimple on my nose right before I went to see my BFFs that it did not entirely hide.  I still had a bit of redness show through though it did make it look less glowingly obvious.  That doesn't take away points though because that would just asking for too much.  I know I need a concealer for that. 

As far as application goes, the stick format is very convenient.  You can just dab it on all over and blend it out with for fingers.  Naturally the Bobbi Brown Foundation Brush, which I used to try this on in the store provides a more perfected finish.  However, Bobbi Brown does not come cheap.  The foundation stick is $40, and the brush $35.  Maybe I'll add it to my Birthday Wishlist.

Until next time...

My X-Mas Wishlist

No need for a real intro...

A NEW FOUNDATION

Smashbox Camera Ready Cream to Powder foundation in Light L3-L4 because I'm positively ghostly.
This stuff works magic....

CONCEALER TO HIDE MY AWFUL SKIN

Smashbox Camera Ready FULL COVERAGE (because my skin is a ~MESS~) Concealer in Medium Vanilla 3.0 because again, I am a ghost of my former glorious self.

SOME NEW MASCARA BECAUSE I SURE CAN'T AFFORD ANY RIGHT ABOUT NOW

Tarte's Lights! Camera! Lashes! Mascara

SOME PRETTY NEW LIPSTICK COLORS:

MAC Lipstick in Siss

Mac Lipstick in Show Orchid so I can try to live out my dreams of being edgy and high fashion.

A GIFT CERTIFICATE OR STRAIGHT UP DOLLA BILLS

A Gift Certificate to Taka Hair Salon so Maki can fix the mess I'm left with after trying a New York Salon.

$28.88 to go to Darque Tan for a month so I can cease being a ghost....It's my only real vice okay?! And yes she's lounging on a tanning bed...

MOROCCAN OIL

Moroccan Oil -- To help the dry tumbleweed on my head.

SOME NEW COLOR CONTACT LENSES

Beaucon Shimmer Grey with No Power

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Straight up dolla bills are always much appreciated in every circumstance.

In my dreams...

A CUTE WHITE COAT

Guess Charlotte Belted Coat in Milk so I can be stylin when I return to NYC

SOME NEW FRAGRANCE

Dior's Miss Dior Cherie...because its been 4 years and I still haven't gotten it. Le sigh.

LASH EXTENSIONS

 

I don't know, I've always wanted to try them but never felt like dropping $140 on them because I was too busy dropping that much or more at the hair salon.

A SPONSOR

For my much desired nose job from Dr. Rollin K Daniel. Yeaaah that's gonna set me back a bit,

I hate to sound ungracious, but I just have to put it out there--there's nothing more disappointing that getting a lotion/body wash/etc. as gift.  And whoever you are reading this--I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU AGREE WITH ME.  The only times its okay is when its from someone who's not exactly a friend and was just being nice.  But when its from a friend...boo..

Oh yeah--and a new roommate.  I really need to take some time to write out everything that's occurred between "the beast," as I like to refer to her, and I but alas there has been no time.  In short--it was like I had to go Bad Girl's Club on her.  Totally Natalie Nunn style (minus any actual hitting...I've no doubt she's try to sue me or something she is *that* ridiculous*).  This isstill in the process of being solved.  But yeah, it sucks.  :(

Finals Suck

A lot.  EFF COLLEGE.

The Nutcracker

Last night I totally won tickets to see the Nutcracker at the New York City Ballet!  The thing is, I feel SO lucky because I didn't really win the tickets--I was waitlisted, so I had to cross my fingers and hope some one who did win did not go so I could.  We were supposed to meet at 5, but I got there at like 4:15 because I wanted to make sure I was the first one there because I wanted them SO badly!  There was this other girl who was waitlisted and came around the same time I did (I'm not sure if it was before or after because we were meeting in the Lobby of this huge building, so it wasn't obvious who was waiting for what or why etc.).  At first I asked if she was the organizer--but she wasn't, she was waitlisted too.  My little competitive edge wanted to be--not a bitch--but I was wary of becoming friendly with her because when it came down to it I wanted those tickets and there would be none of that, "Ohhhhh well, you can go." nonsense.

Anyway, long story short--there were two spots so we both got to go!  It was beautiful!  I'm taking ballet (ahem...ballet 1 mind you) so I could really appreciate all the technique and skill it took to do what they were doing.  There were so many moments where I was literally in awe of how beautiful and graceful the ballerinas were able to move.  They work practically their whole lives to be able to do what they do so its really inspiring.

I wanted to snap some pictures during the show but I didn't want to be THAT person (just like how there was THAT person who wouldn't stop coughing behind me--UGH!).  Here's a couple of the theater though...

 Omg!

OMG!

I was totally cheesing the entire time.  I didn't like the little girl who played Marie though.  I didn't ~believe~ her.  There are no lines, just dancing, so every little movement counts and she did not put enough effort and feeling in every movement.

Anyway, best part hands down was the duet between....the girl and the guy in green.  I don't know their names...it wasn't the Sugarplum fairy though.

I know, I know, where are the pictures of myself...I forgot to take one.  Well, really I just didn't have time to be vain since I was meeting people and stuff.  Afterward we got to go and have dessert at this cute little Frenchie restaurant.  I got a nutella crepe.  It was heaven.

Anyway, this show totally stole my heart.  I'd love to see Sleeping Beauty next year.  The music, and Disney Movie, are some of my faves.

Magical... :*)

Thanksgiving and more importantly, BLACK FRIDAY

This Thanksgiving I decided not to fly out back home to L.A.  It would have been way too expensive, and so not worth it as half the time I would have just been en route.  So I went with my floormate Shelly (whom I loveee) to her friend's dorm with a kitchen and we made a little Thanksgiving dinner.  I had something a bit more clean and...more organized in mind, but everybody was super chill so it was fun.  There was no meat to be seen (the girl, Racine, was a vegetarian) so we had all these interesting vegetable dishes.  One was actually quite delish.  Everybody ate all my macaroni and cheese and they loved my cake (which I artfully saved as it almost turned into a mess due to a lack of proper tools) so I was happy.  I'll post the cake recipe later!  I would have liked to accompany it with pictures but I didn't think to take any...

But moving on: BLACK FRIDAY.

Okay so I will admit I was scared.  I've only been Black Friday shopping like once in L.A. and all I could picture in NYC was pure chaos.  As I said to my friend, "I want to go shopping...but I don't want to, like, die."  I was trooper though, and totally woke up at 6:30am, was on the subway by 7:00am, and in Herald Square by 7:30am.  I went to the huge Macy's that's there and got the boots I was eyeing last time for 30% off!  So from $129 to like $79 or something.

They're even real leather...

I really wanted a purse but all the ones I were interested in were either not on sale or still way more than I wanted to pay.  I popped by Steve Madden and Victoria's Secret but by that time it was around 10am and it was wayyy too crazy.  I went to Aldo and I got this cute purse to go with my boots for only $26!

 

I still need a grey one though!

 

So, by this time I was already over my allotted budget of approx. $100, but then I went into H&M, just to see what was happening in the accessories, since I don't tend to prefer their clothes (they just never fit me quite right).  BUT, there were having these $10 fabulous finds AND everything that was on sale was 2 for 1 so I just had to get this cute plaid shirt dress that probably everyone and their mom will be wearing since I saw so many people checking out with it but either way:

Originally $34.95.  So not worth that much...

 And this cute knit beanie...not on sale but still cheap:

I popped by this random discount store called Daffy's.  I wasn't really feeling much in there, but then these shoes just popped up out of nowhere and they were so cute and unique looking I could not resist.  I may still return them because I don't tend to just wear heels out and about.  But they were just SO adorable I could not resist.

OMG!

They were on like super sale too.  UGH!  This is like Confessions of a Shopaholic or something.  Although after talking to Shelly, who went with some girls on a 14 hour shopping expedition in a limo throughout New Jersey...I'm not that bad.  ;D

Really I'm just glad my roomate from hell is not here and shouldn't be back until tomorrow.  More on that situation another time.